As I was finishing my little yoga routine tonight, God put the topic of joy on my heart. I'll be honest - I couldn't even finish my workout because I was a bit too excited to dive into the study of joy and reflect on how this theme has come in and out of my life.
As I'm sitting in my sun room (that's not so sunny considering it's after dark), sipping on tea, reading my Bible and listening to music, I'm feeling rather joyful.
Many of you who know me well know that I struggled with the lack of joy for years. I let depression rule my life for a good three years before I started fighting back. Tonight, I chose to meditate on Isaiah 35:10 because I long for those moments of joy that completely overwhelm you. It's as if you don't know what else to do besides laugh or lay down or sing or dance or whatever you feel you need to do!
"And the ransomed of the Lord will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away."
-Isaiah 25:10
When I began my journey out of depression and back into the joy God was holding for me, it was a fight to even see glimpses of it. However, as time went on, the joy would completely overwhelm me in the most random moments.
I remember one time I was making cupcakes with my best friend, Mary, in Chattanooga and we were both consumed with joy at the same time out of nowhere. We ended up on the floor laughing for a solid half hour.
There have been times in my life, especially lately, when I'm feeling sad or frustrated and I have to stop myself and remember who my Creator is and I allow the joy to overtake me while my sorrow and sighing flee.
Friends, joy is one of our greatest weapons, so it only makes sense that the devil is constantly attacking it. Don't let him win for as long as I did. I promise it's worth the fight.
I was actually there in the video below. That was the night of my biggest break through with depression and I've never been the same...
First of all, you are amazing for talking so openly about struggling with depression. I struggled with it too all through middle school, high school, and college. It's only been in the last few years that I've been able to overcome it but I still don't have the courage to really talk openly about it. Thank you, for having the courage to share. Knowing there are other people who battle this makes the world seem a lot less lonely and who knows maybe one of these days I'll be able to talk about it as well.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, I love this new format on your blog. All those books without titles was driving me nuts! Not that I'm OCD or anything.........
Seriously though, you ROCK!
It's truly amazing to step back and analyze the battle that goes on in the spiritual world.
ReplyDeleteThose that really know you would say that "Joy" is an overwhelming attribute in your life. It's no wonder that it would be the one thing the dark side would try to steal.
The amazing thing is that during the time when you were struggling with joy in your own life, he had no power not stop your joy from benefiting others. On your darkest day the gift of joy could only be suppressed from you. You were still an instrument of joy to the rest of the world.
You won this battle and through its struggle you know how to win any battle that comes your way. I'm both proud and honored to share this life with you!