Do Not Be Wise in Your Own Eyes

It's no surprise that this past week or so has been very difficult for me. I've been completely thrown by the spiritual/emotional slap that came along with breaking my foot.

I was surprised because I felt like I had been doing well and everything in my life is so great right now (I'm getting married in a few months, wedding plans are all ahead of schedule, we were in the middle of the holidays, everyone in my family is doing well), so a broken foot shouldn't cancel all that out, right? Well, I was missing a key component - the past few weeks I really had lost a passion and desire to connect with the Lord. My prayer life had been dragging and I hadn't been studying the Word like I used to. 

I thought I had everything under control, but I was leaning into my natural tendency to rely on myself rather than God. That put me in a very vulnerable place when I found myself completely immobile and depending on others. Honestly, I began to sink into a minor depression.

Fortunately, I have a loving mother who reminded me of this verse and makes me say it every day:
 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding. In all things acknowledge Him and He will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes, fear the Lord and turn from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones. 

- Proverbs 3:5-8

I like this because it talks directly about bones!

I will not lean on my own understanding. It's easy to surf the web and glean all the information about foot conditions, but it's also scary because you read horror stories of the simplest fractures taking months and months to heal. I don't have months and months to heal though. I will be walking at my wedding on my two feet - no crutches. 

Bottom line - I must live out this verse. I will trust in the Lord with all my heart. He's not surprised that I'm in this situation. He's not thinking... Hm, she's really gotten herself into a pickle this time. I will turn from my sinful tendency for depression and rather choose joy. I choose to believe and trust that the Lord will heal my foot in the expected amount of time, if not sooner. 

Again, a big thanks to everyone who has kept me company and checked up on me. I'm a very blessed girl and can't imagine doing this on my own.

Also, I'm excited because Becca is coming to hang out with me on Thursday evening! Yay - keep me busy!